Transcript:Cook (Lumbridge)
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Standard dialogue
Before starting Cook's Assistant
- Cook: What am I to do?
- What's wrong?
- Player: What's wrong?
- Cook: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, I'm in a terrible terrible mess! It's the Duke's birthday today, and I should be making him a lovely big birthday cake.
- Cook: I've forgotten to buy the ingredients. I'll never get them in time now. He'll sack me! What will I do? I have four children and a goat to look after. Would you help me? Please?
- I'm always happy to help a cook in distress.
- Player: Yes, I'll help you.
- Cook: Oh thank you, thank you. I need milk, an egg and flour. I'd be very grateful if you can get them for me.
- If the player already has the necessary items:
- Player: I have all of those ingredients on me already!
- Cook: That's an odd coincidence... Were you planning on making a cake too?
- Player: Not exactly. I just had an odd feeling you might be needing these ingredients. If I see a cook, I presume there's food of some kind! Lucky guess I suppose.
- Cook: Well thank you! Hand them over, please.
- Cook: You've brought me everything I need! I am saved! Thank you!
- Player: So do I get to go to the Duke's Party?
- Cook: I'm afraid not, only the big cheeses get to dine with the Duke.
- Player: Well, maybe one day I'll be important enough to sit on the Duke's table.
- Cook: Maybe, but I won't be holding my breath.
- (End of dialogue)
- Player: So where do I find these ingredients then?
- Where do I find some flour?
- Cook: There is a Mill fairly close, go North and then West. Mill Lane Mill is just off the road to Draynor. I usually get my flour from there.
- If the player has an empty pot with them:
- Cook: Talk to Millie, she'll help, she's a lovely girl and a fine Miller. Make sure you take a pot with you for the flour though, you've got one on you already.
- (Shows other options)
- If the player does not have an empty pot with them:
- Cook: Talk to Millie, she'll help, she's a lovely girl and a fine Miller. Make sure you take a pot with you for the flour though, there should be one on the table in here.
- (Shows other options)
- How about milk?
- Cook: There is a cattle field on the other side of the river, just across the road from the Groats' Farm.
- Cook: Talk to Gillie Groats, she looks after the Dairy cows - she'll tell you everything you need to know about milking cows!
- If the player has an empty bucket with them:
- Cook: You'll need an empty bucket for the milk itself. I do see you've got a bucket with you already luckily!
- (Shows other options)
- If the player does not have an empty bucket with them:
- Cook: You'll need an empty bucket for the milk itself. The general store just north of the castle will sell you one for a couple of coins.
- (Shows other options)
- And eggs? Where are they found?
- Cook: I normally get my eggs from the Groats' farm, on the other side of the river.
- Cook: But any chicken should lay eggs.
- Where do I find some flour?
- (Same as above)
- How about milk?
- (Same as above)
- And eggs? Where are they found?
- (Same as above)
- I've got all the information I need. Thanks.
- Player: I've got all the information I need. Thanks.
- (End of dialogue)
- Actually, I know where to find this stuff.
- Player: Actually, I know where to find this stuff.
- (End of dialogue)
- I can't right now, Maybe later.
- Player: No, I don't feel like it. Maybe later.
- Cook: Fine. I always knew you Adventurer types were callous beasts. Go on your merry way!
- (End of dialogue)
- Can you make me a cake?
- Player: You're a cook, why don't you bake me a cake?
- Cook: *sniff* Don't talk to me about cakes...
- Player: What's wrong?
- (Same as above)
- You don't look very happy.
- Player: You don't look very happy.
- Cook: No, I'm not. The world is caving in around me - I am overcome by dark feelings of impending doom.
- What's wrong?
- (Same as above)
- I'd take the rest of the day off if I were you.
- Player: I'd take the rest of the day off if I were you.
- Cook: No, that's the worst thing I could do. I'd get in terrible trouble.
- Player: Well maybe you need to take a holiday...
- Cook: That would be nice, but the Duke doesn't allow holidays for core staff.
- Player: Hmm, why not run away to the sea and start a new life as a Pirate?
- Cook: My wife gets sea sick, and I have an irrational fear of eyepatches. I don't see it working myself.
- Player: I'm afraid I've run out of ideas.
- Cook: I know I'm doomed.
- Player: What's wrong?
- (Same as above)
- Nice hat!
- Player: Nice hat!
- Cook: Err thank you. It's a pretty ordinary cooks hat really.
- Player: Still, suits you. The trousers are pretty special too.
- Cook: Its all standard cook's issue uniform...
- Player: The whole hat, apron, stripey trousers ensemble - it works. It make you looks[sic] like a real cook.
- Cook: I am a real cook! I haven't got time to be chatting about Culinary Fashion. I am in desperate need of help!
- Player: What's wrong?
- (Same as above)
During Cook's Assistant
- Cook: How are you getting on with finding the ingredients?
- If the player has no ingredients:
- Player: I haven't got any of them yet, I'm still looking.
- Cook: Please get the ingredients quickly. I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me into the streets!
- Select an Option
- I'll get right on it.
- Player: I'll get right on it.
- (End of dialogue)
- Can you remind me how to find these things again?
- (Same as above)
- If the player has a bucket of milk:
- Player: Here's a bucket of milk.
- If the player has a pot of flour:
- Player: Here's a pot of flour.
- If the player has an egg:
- Player: Here's a fresh egg.
- If the player has given some but not all ingredients:
- Cook: Thanks for the ingredients you have got so far. Please get the rest quickly - I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me into the streets!
- Select an Option
- I'll get right on it.
- (Same as above)
- Can you remind me how to find these things again?
- (Same as above)
- If the player has given all all ingredients:
- Cook: You've brought me everything I need! I am saved! Thank you!
- Player: So do I get to go to the Duke's Party?
- Cook: I'm afraid not, only the big cheeses get to dine with the Duke.
- Player: Well, maybe one day I'll be important enough to sit on the Duke's table.
- Cook: Maybe, but I won't be holding my breath.
- (End of dialogue)
After Cook's assistant
- Cook: How is the adventuring going, my friend?
- Do you have any other quests for me?
- If the player is on a free-to-play world:
- Cook: I don't have anything for you to do right now, sorry.
- (End of dialogue)
- If the player is on a members' world:
- (Transcript missing. edit)
- If the player is on a free-to-play world:
- I am getting strong and mighty.
- Player: I am getting strong and mighty. Grrr[sic]
- Cook: Glad to hear it.
- (End of dialogue)
- I keep on dying.
- Player: I keep on dying.
- Cook: Ah well, at least you keep coming back to life!
- (End of dialogue)
- Can I use your range?
- Player: Can I use your range?
- Cook: Go ahead - it's a very good range. It's easier to use than most other ranges.
- Cook: Its called the Cook-o-matic 100. It uses a combination of state of the art temperature regulation and magic.
- Player: Will it mean my food will burn less often?
- Cook: Well, that's what the salesman told us anyway...
- Player: Thanks?
- (End of dialogue)
Interacting with the cooking range in Lumbridge Castle before finishing Cook's Assistant
- Cook: Hey, who said you could use that?
- (End of dialogue)
2019 Easter event
After starting the 2019 Easter Event
- Talk about Easter.
- Player: Hello Cook. The Easter Bunny has run out of fuel for his egg making machine and has sent me to ask you for a favour.
- Cook: I am listening.
- Player: Do you by chance have any Hosidius milk? The Easter Bunny needs some to make the fuel.
- Cook: I may have some lying around the kitchen, I would gladly give you some milk for the Easter Bunny.
- Cook: But first you must answer a riddle. If you get it right, I will give you some Hosidius milk.
- Player: I would be glad to answer a riddle for you.
- Cook: Are you ready to answer my riddle?
- Yes.
- Player: Yes I am ready, crack out your riddle.
- A random dialogue is selected from the following:
- Dialogue 1
- Cook: I leave my home only once a year, but do not give any Christmas cheer. Who am I?
- Count Check.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Easter Bunny.
- Cook: Congratulations, that's the right answer.
- Cook: Here is the Hosidius milk I promised.
- You receive a bottle of Hosidius milk
- (End of dialogue)
- Father Aereck.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Bob.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Santa.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Dialogue 2
- Cook: Filling me with eggs is bad... but I'll make a case for it.
- River Lum.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Sack.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Spider web.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Basket.
- Cook: Congratulations, that's the right answer.
- Cook: Here is the Hosidius milk I promised.
- You receive a bottle of Hosidius milk
- (End of dialogue)
- Bucket.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Dialogue 3
- Cook: When dark and bitter, drink me warm in the winter.
- Lemon juice.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Beer.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Sewer water.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Butter.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Chocolate.
- Cook: Congratulations, that's the right answer.
- Cook: Here is the Hosidius milk I promised.
- You receive a bottle of Hosidius milk
- (End of dialogue)
- Dialogue 4
- Cook: I am round, yet not a perfect sphere. I can be cracked and not have anything inside. What am I?
- Easter Egg.
- Cook: Congratulations, that's the right answer.
- Cook: Here is the Hosidius milk I promised.
- You receive a bottle of Hosidius milk
- (End of dialogue)
- The Grand Exchange.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Cake.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Potato.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- Choc-ice.
- Cook: I am sorry but that is not quite right.
- Cook: Talk to me when you're ready to try again.
- (End of dialogue)
- No.
- Player: Not just yet, maybe later.
- (End of dialogue)
- (Non-event dialogue) Something else.
After receiving the Hosidius Milk from the 2019 Easter Event
- Talk about Easter.
- Cook: You should probably go and give the milk to the Easter Bunny, hop to it. Don't want to keep the Easter Bunny waiting.
- (End of dialogue)
- (Non-event dialogue) Something else.
After losing the Hosidius Milk from the 2019 Easter Event
- Talk about Easter.
- Player: I seem to have lost the milk, do you by any chance have any more?
- Cook: Of course I do, try not to spill it this time.
- You receive a bottle of Hosidius milk
- (Non-event dialogue) Something else.
Treasure Trails
Beginner
- Cook: Well done.
- You've [found a new clue scroll/obtained a casket]!
- (Player receives a [new clue scroll/casket].)
- (End of dialogue)
Medium
- Cook: I've always wondered how many cannons the castle has. Could you find out for me?
- (Player receives a challenge scroll.)
- The cook has given you a challenge scroll!
When talked to again
- Cook: Please tell me how many cannons there are.
- When given the wrong answer:
- Cook: Hmm, I don't think that's right.
- (End of dialogue)
- When given the correct answer:
- Cook: Cheers!
- (Player receives [another clue scroll/a casket].)
- The cook has given you [another clue scroll/a casket]!
20th Anniversary event dialogue
2021 Easter event
Acquiring colourful eggs
- (If Draynor is decorated with Ned's cyan painted door or Eastdoor decorations:) Ask about the Easter event.
- If the Cook believes Gregg to be at the kitchen:
- Cook: Oh, what a cute bunny! I didn't realize it was Easter already!
- Gregg: Cute?! I'll give you cute! I'll...
- Player: *AHEM*
- Gregg: Sorry.
- Player: Cook, we're looking for some fancy eggs that we can use as decorations. You wouldn't happen to have anything, would you?
- Cook: Hmm... Well, I do have a large collection of eggs, but most of them are regular old chicken eggs for making cakes.
- Cook: Though come to think of it, I might have something...
- Gregg: Go on...
- Cook: I have a... 'special' collection of eggs that I keep in the... well... back of my cupboards for very... 'special' occasions.
- Cook: I don't know if this occasion is special enough, though.
- Gregg: Hey! I'll have you know Easter is a very special occasion!
- Cook: Well, that's me convinced! Let me dig them out for you!
- The Cook digs around the back of his cupboards and produces several colourful eggs, giving them to Gregg.
- Gregg: Ooh! These are perfect! Thanks a lot!
- Cook: Don't mention it!
- Cook: Seriously, don't mention it.
- Player: Well, we have some eggs now. What's next?
- Gregg: Hmm... I think some nice fluffy wool could look quite nice...
- Cook: There's a sheep pen not too far north of here. You could get some fresh wool if you wanted.
- Gregg: That sounds perfect! I'll meet you there, human!
- Cook: Yes, go to the sheep pen and out of my kitchen...
- (Continues below)
- If the Cook believes Gregg to be at the kitchen:
- (Non-event dialogue) Ask about something else.
Hearing Gregg's next task
- Ask about the Easter event.
- Starts above from "Well, we have some eggs now. What's next?"
- (Non-event dialogue) Ask about something else.
Talking to the Cook before going to the sheep pen
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- Ask about the Easter event.
- Cook: Oh, you're still here.
- Gregg: Yep! Just passing the time, you know!
- Cook: Didn't you say you were off to the sheep pen north of here?
- Gregg: We're not in a hurry. The sheep are in a pen, so it's not like they can go anywhere.
- Cook: Actually, while you're still here, there's something else you can do.
- Cook: It's the Duke's birthday soon, and I'm running low on ingredients.
- If the player has not started or finished Cook's Assistant:
- Player: As important as the Duke of Lumbridge is, I'm sure he won't mind waiting a little longer for the sake of Easter.
- (End of dialogue)
- If the player has finished Cook's Assistant, but not a part of Recipe for Disaster:(Transcript missing - This condition is unconfirmed. edit)
- Player: Wait... didn't the Duke just have his birthday?
- Cook: Ahem... forget I said anything.
- (End of dialogue)
- If the player has finished Cook's Assistant and a part of Recipe for Disaster (?):(Transcript missing - This condition is unconfirmed. edit)
- Player: Cook, as fun as it is bringing you ingredients, don't you just burn all your cakes anyway?
- Cook: I... well yes, but how else am I supposed to train cooking?
- Player: You could try something simple like fish, perhaps?
- Cook: And have the entire castle smelling like Port Sarim? No thank you!
- (End of dialogue)
- (Non-event dialogue) Ask about something else.
Learning the truth of colourful eggs from the Cook
- (If Draynor is decorated with Ned's cyan painted door or Eastdoor decorations:) Ask about the Easter event.
- If the Cook believes Gregg to be at the kitchen (usually the player should be able to find Gregg at the kitchen):
- (Same as above)
- If the Cook doesn't believe Gregg to be at the kitchen (even if Gregg was never at the kitchen):
- Player: The eggs you gave Gregg were just rotten ones, weren't they.
- Cook: Well, he wanted some funny looking eggs, and they were the funniest I had.
- Cook: Just be thankful he didn't ask for some fancy milk instead!
- If the player has not claimed the 2021 Easter event rewards:
- Player: *sigh* Do you know where he went at least?
- If the Cook believes Gregg is in the sheep pen (usually when the player should be able to find Gregg in the sheep pen):
- Cook: I think he said he was going to the sheep pen north of here.
- (End of dialogue)
- If the Cook doesn't believe Gregg to be in the sheep pen (usually when the player should not be able to find Gregg in the sheep pen):
- Cook: How should I know? You should check in Draynor, maybe you'll find him there.
- (End of dialogue)
- (End of dialogue)
- If the Cook believes Gregg to be at the kitchen (usually the player should be able to find Gregg at the kitchen):
- (Non-event dialogue) Ask about something else.