Transcript:Poison Salesman

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Standard dialogue

• Talk about the Murder Mystery Quest
  • Poison Salesman: I hear you're pretty smart to have solved the Sinclair Murder!
  • (End of dialogue)
• Talk about the Fremennik Trials
  • Player: Hello.
  • Poison Salesman: Howdy! Thanks for buying all that low alcohol beer from me! Now I have the funds to whip up a new batch of my patented multipurpose poison!
  • Poison Salesman: Maybe I can take your name and add it to my mailing list for potential purchasers of Peter Potter's patented multipurpose poison?
  • Player: Thanks, but no thanks.
  • (End of dialogue)

During The Fremennik Trials quest

• Talk about the Murder Mystery Quest
  • (Same as above)
• Talk about the Fremennik Trials
  • Poison Salesman: Howdy! You seem like someone with discerning taste! Howsabout you try my brand new range of alcohol?
  • Player: Didn't you used to sell poison?
  • Poison Salesman: That I did, indeed! Peter Potter's Patented Multipurpose poison! A miracle of modern apothecarys! My exclusive concoction has been test on...
  • Player: Uh, yeah, I've already heard the sales pitch.
  • Poison Salesman: Sorry stranger, old habits die hard I guess.
  • Poison Salesman: So you don't sell poison any more?
  • Poison Salesman: Well, I would, but I ran out of stock. Business wasn't helped with that stuff that happened up at the Sinclair Mansion much either, I'll be honest.
  • Poison Salesman: So, being the man of enterprise that I am I decided to branch out a little bit!
  • Player: Into alcohol?
  • Poison Salesman: Absolutely! The basic premise between alcohol and poison is pretty much the same, after all! The difference is that my alcohol has a unique property others do not!
  • Player: And what is that?
  • The salesman takes a deep breath.
  • Poison Salesman: Ever been too drunk to find your own home? Ever wished that you could party away all night long, and still wake up fresh as a daisy the next morning?
  • Poison Salesman: Thanks to the miracles of modern magic we have come up with just the solution you need! Peter Potter's Patented Party Potions!
  • Poison Salesman: It looks just like beer! It tastes just like beer! It smells just like beer! But... it's not beer!
  • Poison Salesman: Our mages have mused for many moments to bring you this miracle of modern magic! It has all the great tastes you'd expect, but contains absolutely no alcohol!
  • Poison Salesman: That's right! You can drink Peter Potters Patented Party Potion as much as you want, and suffer absolutely no ill effects whatsoever!
  • Poison Salesman: The clean fresh taste you know you can trust, from the people who brought you; Peter Potters Patented multipurpose poison, Peter Potters peculiar paint packs
  • Poison Salesman: and Peter Potters paralysing panic pins. Available now from all good stockists! Ask your local bartender now, and experience the taste revolution of the century!
  • He seems to have finished for the time being.
  • Player: So... when you say 'all good stockists'...
  • Poison Salesman: Yes?
  • Player: How many inns actually sell this stuff?
  • Poison Salesman: Well... nobody has actually bought any yet. Everyone I try and sell it to always asks me what exactly the point of beer that has absolutely no effect on you is.
  • Player: So what is the point?
  • Poison Salesman: Well... Um... Er... Hmmm. You, er, don't get drunk.
  • Poison Salesman: I see...
  • Poison Salesman: Aw man... You don't want any now do you? I've really tried to push this product, but I just don't think the world is ready for beer that doesn't get you drunk.
  • Poison Salesman: I'm a man ahead of my time I tell you! It's not that my products are bad, it's that they're too good for the market!
  • Player: Actually, I would like some. How much do you want for it?
  • Poison Salesman: Y-you would??? Um, okay! I knew I still had the old salesman skills going on!
  • Poison Salesman: I'll sell you a keg of it for only 250 gold pieces! So what do you say?
  • Yes
    • Player: Yes please!
      • If the player doesn't have 250 coins
      • Poison Salesman: Sorry pal, we do not offer credit for any purchases made of Peter Potter's patented party potion! Come back when you have the cash!
    • (End of dialogue)
  • No
    • Player: No, not really.
    • (End of dialogue)

Talking to the Poison Salesman again during The Fremennik Trials

• Talk about the Murder Mystery Quest
  • (Same as above)
• Talk about the Fremennik Trials
  • Player: I understand you have some low alcohol beer for sale...?
  • Poison Salesman: That I do, and sales are rocketing upwards as word of mouth spreads of it's clean taste and cool flavour! So... you want to buy some?
  • Yes
    • Player: Yes please!
      • If the player doesn't have 250 coins
      • Poison Salesman: Sorry pal, we do not offer credit for any purchases made of Peter Potter's patented party potion! Come back when you have the cash!
    • (End of dialogue)
  • No
    • Player: No, not really.
    • (End of dialogue)

After The Fremennik Trials quest

• Talk about the Murder Mystery Quest
  • (Same as above)
• Talk about the Fremennik Trials
  • Player: Hello.
  • Poison Salesman: Howdy! Thanks for buying all that low alcohol beer from me! Now I have the funds to whip up a new batch of my patented multipurpose poison!
  • Poison Salesman: Maybe I can take your name and add it to my mailing list for potential purchasers of Peter Potter’s patented multipurpose poison?
  • Player: Thanks, but no thanks.
  • (End of dialogue)